What is in a name?

  Some names inherently mean a lot to people and others you hear and instantly forget about even if you interact with that person regularly. For reasons I'm not going to explain the name Sheppard has very mixed feelings for me, more specifically John Sheppard. It brings up some good memories and some very painful memories. All that power in a single name, whether I read it or hear it.

  Just this last week though I've started to form some new memories about that name that will in time I think make the painful memories less distinct. How you ask? Simple really, I started playing a new game (well to me anyway) Mass Effect 2 where the main character of the game is named Shepard (yes I know, it is spelled differently but pronounced exactly the same). One advantage of this game though is that you can either play through it as either a male or female character.

  Given the choice I always enjoy playing through games as both genders, males since I can pretend to be someone I would want to be and females since I can be someone I would like to be with. Sounds a little strange yes but that is just the way I play. For this game though I immediately picked a female character and customised her to my liking. I'm playing her as a considerate, caring, principled and all round good person since I never find any real fun in doing the "evil" or "bad" morality choices in games. The story and conversations with other people in the game world are interesting and well acted (the voice actress for the main character is so much better than the male version it is laughable).

  Overall I'm enjoying playing through the game a lot and can see myself spending a long time with this particular game. With that I'm forming all sorts of good new memories and I associate with the name Shepard. This is why I said in time the other memories I really don't want to bring to the forefront every time I hear that name will fade. In their place will be these newer, fresher and all over happier memories that will help me move on beyond the pain.

  With all that said I would therefore like to introduce my character from the game, Joan Shepard.

  The picture is a little blurry since it was taken with a camera phone from my TV, not the best way to do it but it worked. Yes I also know I picked a redhead with green eyes, a particularly faviourite combination of mine, since I figured if I'm going to watch this character for dozens of hours while playing this game I should at least make it nice to look at (men are shallow like that sometimes, no big news there).

  There we go, one more thought process written about and aired to the world. It is amazing how liberating and enjoyable this is. I owe my friend who suggested I start this blog a great big thank you.